Category Archive for ‘Funny Funnerson’ at Kerry On the Spot

Archive for the 'Funny Funnerson' Category

A quickie

Here’s a quick post. I am feeling a bit undone… overwhelmed. Or maybe I am feeling like a roll of tape where you can’t find the end…. pissy. I feel like I want to cry, and I have no reason to except for the fact that I feel overwhelmed and pissy. See. Please, no pity party. This girl needs to buck-up and appreciate all the goodness that surrounds her. Right? I can’t help but think, though, a good cry would feel really awesome.

So, in an effort of denial, and in an effort to focus on laughter — if it truly is the best medicine…

Go visit Sexy People.

Go!!!!!

Did you see the family portait with the girl with the Cabbage Patch doll? *gasping for air* Excuse me, I need to use the bathroom….

Holy-Oh-My-Heck! I laughed so hard my sides seized-up… I think I even laughed so deeply I honked. Honked. I probably am a Sexy People too. My heart’s desire is to put the photos from this site up on a big screen and watch them with all of you. And margaritas. I love watching funny stuff with my friends… souped up on margaritas.

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Published

jenny

on December 19, 2008

in 365, Funny Funnerson and Not So Much

. 7 Comments

Now I feel better.

I wish I could say I feel better today than yesterday because I am perfectly content with my person/body. I wish it was because I am a deeply deep person who waxes “empathetic” and works tirelessly to save endangered seahorses and suchnesses. BUT. I am shallow — like a kiddie pool. I am also vein vain and need to be adored. It’s an insatiable need, really… like something that cannot be satiated. I know - I also am gifted when it comes to analogies.

Yesterday afternoon, my hunger to be adored… no, WORSHIPPED… was satisfied by a younger man… We have known each other for the better part of 3 years, but I had no idea…

His eyes… the purest shade of blue.

His hair… golden with hints of warm sand.

My heart… melted to the core…

The magnificently curled ends of my glowing locks (you call yours “hair”), fell against his face as I unbuckled his car seat. I could feel his fingers twirl the strands of my golden goddessness. Poor boy, he was overcome with my beauty, my presence, my my-ness, and he gushed,

You are cuuuuuuuuute.

I turned my head… I could not ignore such words of genius… OF TRUTH… No. He deserved my full attention. With My voice of an angel I asked, “What did you just say?” He continued twirling my hair… for he knew in his hands he held the 8th wonder of the world… and with his gorgeous 3-year-old blue eyes he said,

Yoooooouuu are cuuuuuuuuuuute.

I just about melted all over that parking lot.

*****

That story reminds me of another one. Children are good sources for stories. I spent some time substitute teaching while I was finishing my 5th year degree in college. If my memory serves me correct, I was subbing for either a 1st or 2nd grade class. It was the end of recess and the classes were lining up.

This was a 1/2 day gig, so the kids were expecting their teacher to meet them — but they got me. As the flurry of children were lining up I was bombarded with the same question, “Areyouourteacher? Areyouourteacher? Areyouourteacher? Areyouourteacher? Areyouourteacher?”

Yes… yes… yes… mm-hmm… yesyesyes!

The children settled into their line. I reminded them “Keep your voices down and stay in a straight line…” The entire time the boy at the front of the line kept his gaze fixed on me. I felt it. Like a laser. I met his gaze and smiled… Hey, I’m a giver. I’m all about the children. His sweet little face exploded into a huge smile and he and nearly burst at the seams when he exclaimed at the top of his voice and on the tip of his toes,

You’re PRETTY!!! My DAD would sure like YOU!

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Published

jenny

on December 17, 2008

in 365, Beauty - ha!, Delusions of Grandeur, Funny Funnerson, General and Kerry Jen-Jen

. 8 Comments

Undecided Voter

A few days after the election, my husband and I saw this in one of the yards at a frat house near the University of Washington. My husband took the picture. I was driving, and told him he HAD to get a good picture, because… hello? I’m a blogger! And, as the old saying goes, “I am soooo blogging this!”

Oh yeah, the picture:

My husband titled this: Undecided Voter

Kids these days…

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Published

jenny

on December 12, 2008

in 365, Bloggy Bloggy, Funny Funnerson and The Hubs

. 11 Comments

I have met my match.

And I am not speaking as if I were a single sock.

I am speaking of the great game of ping pong, also known as table tennis.

It has been 3 days since my last table tennis match, and my ankles are still aching. I could use my words to explain… Heaven knows I could come up with plenty, but I think I will go ahead and let my pictures do most of the “talking”.

You lookin’ at me? You better be wearin’ your mouth guard.

Whut, ladies? You don’t think I can take you?

That’s right. Take that!

And that!

And that!!!

Tired? I’m not tired. I suffer from narcolepsy. Yeah… narcolepsy…

Scorekeeping is for enemies! We practiced serving off the walls and ceilings, and despite a few aching muscles, we left the rec room smiling with no idea who won :)

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Published

jenny

on November 12, 2008

in 365, Friends, Funny Funnerson, General, Kerry Jen-Jen, Ridiculous and Skillz

. 12 Comments

The Ingram Family meets a history lesson and does a craft.

I overheard this conversation between Cole and Cole on our way to school a few days ago… I came in at the end:

Olivia: PILGRIMS???
Joel: You don’t know what Pilgrims AAAAARRRRREEEEE!?
Olivia: Nuh-uh.
Joel: Oliveeeuhhh!!! The Pilgrims (!!!) came across on The CAULIFLOWER!
Olivia: Oh.

And it’s TOTALLY true! We have been fed some lie about some ship called “The Mayflower”… But there was a major error in the ship’s name translation in original documents. Apparently the Ye Olde English word “May” is practically interchangeable with the lesser-used Ye Olde English word “Cauli”. The ship was actually named The Cauliflower!!!
Continue reading ‘The Ingram Family meets a history lesson and does a craft.’

Published

jenny

on November 7, 2008

in 365, Funny Funnerson, General, Joel, Lucy, Mutha' Hood, Olivia and Ridiculous

. 11 Comments

Make Me Laugh Monday - Poking fun all around.

Not only is it Make Me Laugh Monday, but it is also, MMLM… November 3, 2008… Which means it is the day before the 2008 Presidential election which means I can totally make fun of a lot of people here, and who am I to pass up an opportunity, aye?

Therefore and hithertofor… I post one of those FW: fwd: FWD:: emails, that truly made me laugh. It is not often one of those “FW: fwd: FWD::” emails really gets my gut rolling, so I knew I had to share it. You may have received this email, and if so… enjoy it again. If not, then… have fun! Also, I added one at the end. I’m crazy like that.

You wanna know my favorite? Aristotle. I chose him so you’d think I was all-deep and philosophophish. When you leave a comment, tell me which one is YOURS!

Without further ado… Poking Fun at Everyone!

WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD??

SARAH PALIN:
Continue reading ‘Make Me Laugh Monday - Poking fun all around.’

Published

jenny

on November 3, 2008

in 365, Bloggy Bloggy, Funny Funnerson, General and Make Me Laugh Monday

. 12 Comments

An exhaustive account of the 20th anniversary of My 16th birthday.

“Exhaustive??? Why???”

It was exhausting. You’ll see why.
I suffer from a condition called “Self-Importance”, and symptoms of that very painful condition include (but are not limited to) the use of too many words in blog posts, multiple references to oneself, and the capitalization of words such as “Me” or “My”. I exhaust Myself just having to deal with Me.
Lisa’s husband Mark took lots of pictures, and who am I to withhold such talent from My Public?
It’s My blog, that’s why.
I just wanted there to be one more bullet. Multiple bullet-points look important and validate My feelings about Myself.

The first picture is of Lisa and Me. I recently declared Myself the President of The Dance Party. Lisa graciously took the position as my VP. The girl represents! One look at the following picture, and there is no arguing that we truly deserve to be the Prez & V.P. of… The Dance Party. We hold nothing back. No. Thing. I mean - she’s not even touching the ground, and somehow I managed to NOT put my own eye out!

I’m sorry. Every time I look at this picture I nearly pee My pants. Excuse me. I’ll get back to this post in a minute…

Alright. *scoots chair back in* Continue reading ‘An exhaustive account of the 20th anniversary of My 16th birthday.’

Published

jenny

on October 28, 2008

in 365, Dance, Delusions of Grandeur, Friends, Funny Funnerson, General, Kerry Jen-Jen, Ridiculous and The Love

. 16 Comments

If my son had any concept of time

I’d be really mad. But he doesn’t, so I am cutting him a whole lotta slack lately. When he expresses his observations about “the years of old”, he has no idea he is TOTALLY callin’ his mutha an Old Lady. He sees black and white photos and thinks they are pictures of the/my old days (a.k.a. “When YOU were a kid, Mom…”)… but he takes it a step further. He actually thinks that trees and such were in black and white “back in the/my day”.

Oh mah achin’ back! Where’s that blasted-dum-diggity heating pad?

So, today he hits me with some questions that leave me reaching for my dentures cane a bit insulted. Take a peek at the following picture:

That there faucet belongs to a house in which friends live. Isn’t that a REALLY COOL faucet?! It’s so retro, like this old-school water pump, yes? Continue reading ‘If my son had any concept of time’

Published

jenny

on October 5, 2008

in 365, Funny Funnerson, General, Joel, Mutha' Hood and Spawn

. 6 Comments

What do you get when…

5 girlfriends celebrate 1 of those girlfriend’s 40th birthday? You get a whole lotta chocolate, a whole lotta giggling/cackling, and a whole lotta silly… with glasses…

The Birthday Girl. Betcha couldn’t figure out that one.

Heh. Wine glasses.

NaNaNaNaNaNaNaNaNa! Bat Girl!!!

Her future’s so bright - she’s gotta wear shades!

Hollywood… here I come!

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Published

jenny

on September 27, 2008

in 365, Friends, Funny Funnerson and General

. 6 Comments

Kerry, across the decades.

I’m sorry. I’m not normally so full of myself. It’s another post bloated with pictures of Me. It’s not my fault though, Bubba’s Sis found this super site called Yearbook Yourself, and what’s a self-obsessed girl to do, but stay up for hours looking at how hawt she looked decade after decade after decade… Talk about a “timeless beauty”!

*Side note: PapaTV… I see a great Fug Mug possibility here…

But back to Me. The first picture I give you is from 1952. Had I been a senior in high school, my senior picture may have looked like this… and the pin I would have worn - would have belonged to that handsome devil next to me…

1952