Kerry On the Spot

on January 4, 2009

in Bloggy Bloggy, Delusions of Grandeur, Facebook, General, Kerry Jen-Jen, Lucy, My alter-ego, Twitter, Vlogging and Wasting Time

. 13 Comments

It is the last day of the year!

Happy last day of the year-ness to you! I was really struggling with what to post today. It is a very special day… the last of 2008… my last day of the Blog 365 challenge… Which I successfully completed thankyouverymuch. Yet I still wonder if I have been able to really show you who I am(s). I just hate to think that we have spent so much time together and I held back even one small ounce. I want to be open and honest… I want to be sure I wrap this wonderful year up with the perfect post.

Who… or what is this blog about? Yes… Me. And what kind of blogger would I be if I didn’t give you as much of me as I possibly could? Batten down the hatches people… for today you get to meet My best friend. We had a wonderful time together yesterday. We took lots and lots and lots of pictures TOGETHER. I want to share them with you. My BFF is vibrant. She is beautiful. She is smart and witty and loads of fun to be around…. She makes the world a better place… Because we look so much alike, I should tell you, she’s the one on the left.
Continue reading ‘It is the last day of the year!’

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on December 31, 2008

in 365, Friends, General, Kerry Jen-Jen, Ridiculous and Wasting Time

. 38 Comments

Can I Get a Whutwhut?!

So. My kids and Lisa’s kids were tearin’ up around the house last night. At dinner my 6-year-old, Cole started callin’ out her homies… “Can I get a whutwhut?” And the other 4 holla’d back… “Whutwhut!” And I was all… I gotta get these kids on tape… except I don’t know how to just voice record so I popped open iMovie and tried to keep the kids out of the frame so as to protect their identities and this is what was captured:

I feel like I need to defend myself… my kids do not listen to that “Whutwhut” song. I do, but I am a bit of a homegirl (I mean, check out my arm pump people… I am an ANIMAL!)… The “whutwhut” actually came from some influence on the Disney channel, and I feel enough shame just from that. But what was funniest to me was the fact that the kids sounded like the “MineMineMine” seagulls in Finding Nemo (found in the first 25 seconds of the following video):

So, in essence, I spent the night with A Flock of Seagulls last night. Back in the 80’s had I started THAT rumor, I’d have been one popular girl…

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on December 30, 2008

in 365, Animals, Friends, General, Joel, Lucy, Mutha' Hood, Olivia, The Love, Vlogging and Wasting Time

. 6 Comments

My 1000th Post, that’s right.

Dear Friends, family, lurkers… My Public,

I want to thank your for your comments. Your hits, your visits, your searches, your never-ending devotion. I adore you. I love you. I. Need. You. I could never have made it to my 1000th post without YOU. It has taken nearly 5 years to make it to this milestone, and I want you to know… I know. But I wonder, do you? Know? Do you really know Me? I wonder… after nearly five long years of run-ons, tangents, dangling participles, comma-obsessiveness, the abuse of exclamation points, and a myriad of other grammatical atrocities… if somewhere along the way we’ve missed what this blog is all about….

M to the E.

…And if you don’t know me by now… a special multimedia presentation - from ME to YOU:

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Published

on December 26, 2008

in 365, Awesome, Bloggy Bloggy, Delusions of Grandeur, General, Ridiculous and Wasting Time

. 11 Comments

My Newest Vlog - Baking Cookies for a Cookie Exchange

I don’t know why I do this. I ac’ a fool and capture it on video. Then I post it on the whole world of wide internets.It’s on the long side (6 minutes and 44 seconds), and I hate monopolizing so much of your time.

Here, *hands you a virtual eggnog latte that she made, and sprinkled with a dash of nutmeg*. You know what, friends, when I make it into the Sundance Film Festival and receive all kinds of critical acclaim *she also has issues with reality and perception*, you can say,

Hey! I KNOW her! We’re BFF’s! She made me a cuppa coffee!

If you leave a comment, I’ll even have PROOF you were here during my short time as a struggling producer/director/editor/musical scor-er/actor… and I can print out all the comments, and then… I can call you up and we could all go to the film festival together… and all my commenters would be my ENTOURAGE… and I would give you cans of glitter to spray in my general direction when the papparazzi are going WILD over the hot new “name” in film… and you could carry my sparkling water… and I would need someone to carry a fan — because I like the way I look when wind blows my hair… I think that would make me look really pretty for the papparazzi pics… And you could run to Starbucks for me because I’ve noticed actors often carry a Starbucks cup… and I’ll get a puppy to carry in my purse… and we could go to all the parties and dance… Oooh, I am getting EXCITED - we are going to have so much fun when I get famous!!!

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Published

on December 20, 2008

in 365, Delusions of Grandeur, Eats, General, Humiliation, Ridiculous, Vlogging and Wasting Time

. 12 Comments

Karen Carpenter’s vocal twin.

I am pretty sure that would be me.

You remember Karen… with her buttery voice all smooth like a clean shave sans razor burn… Even if you are not a wild fan of The Carpenters (I might fall into that category), it is absolutely inarguable - the woman’s voice is that of an angel. I will delete any comment otherwise. So, I guess what I am really trying to say might be,

I also have the voice of an angel, just like my vocal twin. You criticize her, you criticize me, and I only accept Visa, Mastercard, Discover, American Express, Paypal and COMPLIMENTS.

Got it?

So, as I took a shower… and sang “Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas” in *ahem* buttery tonal perfection… I TOTALLY hit a note that sounded like Karen Carpenter. Totally. I was singin’ away and I was all, “Whut the whut?” I actually looked around for the ghost of Karen Carpenter. Then I thot, like, “THAT’S NO GHOST! THAT’S THE VOICE OF A FRIGGIN’ ANGEL!” I looked around the corner to find neither angel nor ghost… and that was when I realized -

I am the vocal twin of Karen Carpenter!

I! Know! Brains, beauty, crafty skillz, dancin’ skillz, vlogging skillz, and now… singing a note just like Karen Carpenter! If “Awesome” were matter and not an adjective/verb I would totally be oozing all kinds of awesome right now. If “Awesome” were matter, I believe it would look a lot like glitter, smell a lot like chocolate. ButIdigress…

So. Back to Me Karen and Me. We are also big fans of graphic tees.

It’s uncanny, I know…

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Published

on December 13, 2008

in 365, Delusions of Grandeur, General, Ridiculous and Wasting Time

. 11 Comments

A Thanksgiving Vlog

I have a real post about what I am REALLY thankful for… scroll down to the next post. Happy Thanksgiving, my friends and lurkers :)

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on November 27, 2008

in 365, Eats, General, Kerry Jen-Jen, Ridiculous, The Confessional, Vlogging and Wasting Time

. 10 Comments

Maybe I should rethink this “vlogging” thing.

O.K. So. THAT didn’t go EXACTLY as I expected.

In my defense, when I filmed this I still had not yet had my coffee. Not unlike a druggie without his “fix” for the day (or for the hour, I dunno the kinds of schedules druggies keep. Aaaaanywho…). However, a few lessons can be pulled from this experience. I am a giver, so to spare you the agony of making these same mistakes yourself, here are a few hints before filming footage for your next video/vlog post:

Consider background. The trash can is not the ideal background. A tacky-looking, dusty silk plant from your churchs’ foyer is better than a trash can… unless you are making a video of trash cans, of course.
Beware: apparently the camera brings out one’s “Valley Girl” accent. What’s up with that?
Wear make-up.
Have a cuppa coffee.
Fix your hair. For goodness sake, find a flippin’ brush. It ain’t that hard.
Wear some glitter, it distracts from real-life flaws. And it’s fun.
Use a tripod. For so many reasons, Use. A. Tripod.

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Unrelated to vlogging… here is something else I was not expecting:

According to synonym.com, there a no synonyms for chocolate! *rubs eyes*

What the…!!! What about words like: heaven, grace, mercy, true love, tranquility, manna, redemption… ??? !!! I was so stunned I had to take a closer look:

*still rubbing eyes* Really? What about: promised land, hope, glory, perfection, world peace & harmony ???

Dear www.synonym.com,

If you need a new editor, I’m available.

Sincerely,

Kerryonthespot

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Published

on November 19, 2008

in 365, Bloggy Bloggy, General, Not So Much, Ridiculous, Vlogging and Wasting Time

. 17 Comments

A craft, a peeve, & an odd thing.

The craft - I’m gonna try to complete a craft. Despite the fact that I could have sworn I birthed the very last crafting nerve out of my body when my last child was born over 3 years ago, I am going to do a craft! I have wanted to make an Advent calendar for YEARS, and I’m-a-gonna do it! I had a big credit at a scrapbook store, and saw a super-awesome Advent calendar and spent all my credit so I could copy the calendar perfectly and took a picture of the calendar because… it lasts longer (bahdumbum!)

Wish me luck!

The peeve - The little waist ties on sweat pants. Where are you supposed to put them? I don’t wear short shirts, so I always struggle with the “waist-tie bump” under my shirt… OR I struggle to strategically tuck them (read: keep them tucked) behind the waist band. But THEN… sometimes it is too hard to tie them in a nifty bow, so you tie it in a knot because there needs to be a point of tension or them sweatpants just won’t stay up… even if they’re tight.

There’s more. So. When those whispy little ties are in a simple knot, it is not so easy to untie the knotted rascal when one is in a “pinch”… like, say — when a girl has got to use the restroom! Yeah! I don’t know about anybody else, but whens (I know “when” doesn’t have an “s” — EVER, but just pretend the “s” is a written way of me using my arms… body-language in type-form, if you will) I decide to take the time to answer nature’s call… the last thing I need is to fight with a stubborn knot. And that makes me feel angry.

Furthermore… I am an adult woman, and while it might be somewhat “acceptable” for a 3-year-old to “not make it”… not so much for an adult woman. “I PEED!!!” sounds so much different coming from the mouth of a toddler than it does from and adult. Not to mention sheer quantity. TMI?

Which reminds me of an odd thing - I have a relatively sensitive gag reflex. It mostly has to do with conversational items that gross me out. Pictures too. But I’ve noticed another area in which my gag reflex is highly responsive… when I hurt myself. Which is none too rare. Lately (months and months - no I am not pregnant), I have noticed that when I stub my toe or slice my thumb off or hit my funny bone or get a good scratch or crack my head on an open cabinet door… I experience an overwhelming desire/need to vomit/gag. I used to cry or writhe on the floor… now I writhe, but also suffer waves of rather intense, but accute nausea.

Is that normal? Don’t answer that.

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